So, if it takes three licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop, how long does it take for a delicious, home-made, 100% Angus Beef (80/20 mix), organic smoked cheddar-topped, Independence Day-enhanced, backyard BBQ-cooked hamburger to make its way through a stomach cancer patient’s digestive system? As fast as three licks? The world may never (or want to) know. But I can tell you it is quick and not pleasant!

On the Fourth of July, I don’t think there is anything better than a backyard BBQ with burgers, dogs, brats, home-made potato salad, fresh corn, and sliced watermelon. Being from Utah, I suppose I should add green Jell-O salad to the list as well.

It’s no wonder, then, after a month of barely eating – and when I do eat, consuming only rice or mashed potatoes (not to include an ill-advised adventure with Kraft Mac & Cheese…see my 19 Jun post for the torrid details) – I wanted to fully enjoy the holiday’s offerings.

As I sat down at the dinner table, a juicy hot cheeseburger called to me – nothing else. Just the burger. The rest of the holiday’s offerings stayed away from my plate. But not the burger.

With just a small swirl of Heinz fanciest catsup on a gently toasted bun, I ate something that wasn’t pale and bland; rather, it was something succulent and savory.

It. Was. Delicious.

But as good as it tasted, my chemo-ravaged intestinal tract revolted.

There is a reason I can only tolerate a BRAT diet right now…bananas, rice, applesauce, and toast for those (usually little kids) with gastrointestinal issues.

A miserable afternoon ensued as my body rapidly (like three licks fast) flushed the ill effects of BBQ burger bliss. Luckily I was able to recover in time for fireworks out in the front of the house with family, friends, and neighbors.

Lesson re-learned: no yummy foods anytime soon. 😫🤢🤮

That said, I am open to any new and inventive recipes to steam rice or boil potatoes!